Hello 2019- The Catch-up of a Blogger Intern

Hello, I am back. I am introducing myself again. I am  Alison Blue. If you want to know my real name, just communicate with me or refer to my previous posts. I am currently a 4th year medical student or a Senior Clerk from the Philippines' top medical school. If you noticed, my previous post was still a year ago. I may barely post updates unlike during my high school days. I am still delighted to read my previous blog posts. It made me picture out my progress and the way I grow.

It is already 2019 and oh, this year must be special. This is my graduation year. Please pray that I will catch-up all my paperworks and I will not have so many extensions and I will be cleared immediately.

Internship is not really that easy for me. Thanks to internship that I knew well about myself. Yes, it is a straight 365 days with no day off. There are even 36 hours duty and duty-previous duty. At first, it was really unusual that I am away from my mother. I spend most my time taking care of other people who are not even my relatives. There are even times that I think why I am entering this. Do I really need to be a doctor? Do I really deserve this? These things would pop out in my mind most of the time I'm grilled during endorsement or being scolded by my seniors. Even my relationship with my groupmates was being challenged. I am totally different and I get easily hurt. I even had countless anxiety attacks during the course of my duty. I even had absences which I didn't even regret. Thank God for giving me strength. I even thought of giving up. I even thought of not enrolling during 2nd semester. Thank God I am still in front of my patients greeting them "Good Morning!", "Kumusta na man mo? (How are you?)" with beautiful smile.

I learned a lot during the first half of my internship. Aside from surgical techniques, in dealing with pediatric patients, in managing dengue, in making genograms, in handling deliveries with episiotomy and repair, in doing VATEF (visual acuity, adnexa, tonometry, extraocular muscles and fundoscopy, I learned more about myself. Even my faith in God was being challenged. I learned that despite all the challenges I faced, God never left me. Even though I was angry to God for the thought He left me, He made all those things for me to be strong. He made me show that I am meant for this profession. Thanks to my mother for her endless patience, who is always at my side. Thanks to my friends whom I shouted on on my darkest days. Thanks even to the residents who told me, "You are strong! You can do it. You are almost there."

I am currently assigned in VSMMC Center for Behavioral Sciences for Psychiatry. I am thankful that I didn't end up being like my patients. Just kidding. Anyway, I am thankful that I am being able to touch the lives of my patients. I understand how they feel. In short, I can imagine if I am in their shoes. It is really my pleasure seeing them smiling with all my greetings despite of being ill.

Well this is my post for now. Thank you so much for reading.